I did something really hard this past week and I’m quite satisfied with myself that I was able to pull through.
Things at work have been really crazy and my work dynamic with my boss has been intense and from my perspective it was really dragging me into the ground – mentally, emotionally and physically speaking.
I saw for a moment in time two directions my life at work could go in. One in a really positive, happy direction and the other where I was always miserable and feeling quite helpless – and I freaked out. If I continued on this path, the mistakes I had been making I would keep making and things would just become extremely tense. If I made an intervention and apologized things would go in a happier, carefree, positive direction…
I did not have the strength to do what I had to do when I had to do it. But it needed to be done, otherwise things would’ve gone horribly wrong.
I told my boss what I’ve been dealing with roughly for the past 9-18 months. I wrote him a letter and apologized for the shit that went down at work.
Strangely, I have found a sense of healing from doing so. I’m not sure if its’ because I could finally tell someone what I’ve been going through that I trusted or if it was just supposed help me gain some closure or what. But I feel like a load has been lifted from me.
The tension at work has calmed down and things are back to normal. It is very rare for me to see directions of where my life could go so clearly like that. Moments like this are when I’m very glad I am psychic and could see and pick up things like that.